Forty Years Later

Being a paul bearer for my friend was one of the toughest things I've ever done (front right side)

Man, forty years!

Every now and then, I post about what January 31, 1986, means to me. It’s a date I'll never forget—hardly a day goes by that I don’t think about what happened around 2:30 p.m. that afternoon. But I don’t always have new insights to offer.

This year, I didn’t think I did, either. That changed when I attended a wrestling tournament on February 1 and watched several Grand Valley wrestlers compete.

Suddenly, I was back in 1986.

My friend Bob O’Day and I wrestled for Romulus High School that year. We had a strong team—five or six of us ranked in the top ten in Michigan. We were undefeated in dual meets and consistently placed in the top three at tournaments. Bob was our varsity 198-pounder; I was the heavyweight. We practiced together every day and probably wrestled each other 75% of the time.

Watching those matches pulled me back to January 24–25, 1986—one week before everything changed. We were preparing for the Melvindale Tournament, knowing we both had tough brackets. That week of practice was intense. On Friday, we wrestled as each other’s likely opponents, pushing hard. Saturday was a great day. Bob and I both won our weight classes, and Romulus took first place as a team. We were perfectly positioned heading into the final regular-season tournament before districts.

It’s amazing what memories resurface forty years later.

Then my thoughts shifted to the following week in 1986.

Practice was hard on Monday the 27th.

On Tuesday the 28th, the Challenger exploded on live television, and practice was a grind.

Wednesday and Thursday, we locked in for the Lincoln Park tournament.

Friday the 31st, something felt off all day.

An earthquake in Michigan? In January? Yep - we had one!

Life throws unexpected moves—just like wrestling.

At 2:10 p.m., school ended. It was time for our final practice of the week. Bob and I both knew we’d go at it again, preparing for Saturday, February 1, knowing strong performances would determine district seedings.

That practice never happened.

Life punched us in the gut—harder than anything I’d ever felt. There were no counter moves. Nothing could undo what was done.

Bob was stabbed to death by someone who should never have been in the school. I remember teammates rushing to the hospital, sitting in the waiting room. I remember our coach, Coach Schimming, walking out to tell us Bob was gone.

Just like that, hundreds of teenagers, teachers, administrators, a family, and an entire community were forced to confront unimaginable loss.

It was one of the most formative moments of my life—and forty years later, its impact still unfolds. I remain grateful for one of my best friends in high school, whom I haven’t seen or spoken to in forty years.

As I drove home from that tournament, (now 2 days ago) I reflected and remembered what I love about wrestling.

Wrestling is hard.

Wrestling requires discipline, toughness, endurance, agility.

Wrestling demands confidence and humility.

Wrestling forces counter moves, respect, expectation, adaptation.

Wrestling commands mental and physical strength.

Wrestling is enriched when we love, sacrifice, and have an admiration for the grind.

GVSU wrestlers Josh Kenny and Cayden Strong embracing the grind.

Wrestling is awesome.

I love wrestling.

And honestly, you can substitute the word life for wrestling in those statements.

You can also substitute Bob O’Day for wrestling in those statements.

I serve a God that not only commands these same attributes from us in life but modeled them all perfectly when Jesus walked the earth. He now offers these attributes to us to navigate life knowing that victory is much more than having our arm raised at the end of a match. It is about the process; it is about the grind, it is about trust.

What did January 31, 1986, teach me this year?

It reminded me that I miss my friend. It reminded me of why I love this sport. It reminded me of the walk I agreed to when I decided to follow Jesus. Romans 12:1-2 reminds me that my true worship is to offer my body, my mind, my soul to The Lord. I must choose this daily and it ain’t always easy! In Matthew 16:24-26, we read Jesus’ words when he tells the people that in order to follow him, they must pick up their cross (a choice that meant suffering and death) and follow Him. Wrestling isn’t THAT difficult, but it may be the closest chosen comparison I relate to.

What’s my move?

I want Steve Anderson’s life to be able to be substituted for wrestling in those statements – and lived that way daily.